


Breaking

by drsquidlove



Category: Oz (TV)
Genre: Canon, Family, Gen, Injury Recovery, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-03-09 07:39:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3241610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drsquidlove/pseuds/drsquidlove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Toby has his arms and legs broken in Oswald, his parents visit him in hospital. If there's one lesson Toby's mother has learned in the past few years, it's that sometimes you just have to smile, and get through it.</p>
<p>Written for vanillalime for oz_magi 2014. The request:<br/>Toby's parents visit him in the hospital (or Oz infirmary) after Chris and Vern have broken his arms and legs.<br/>Keyword/Prompt Phrase: "Smile, though your heart is aching // Smile, even though it's breaking" (from the traditional pop standard "Smile")</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breaking

**Author's Note:**

> [Originally posted here at oz_magi.](http://oz-magi.livejournal.com/132785.html)
> 
> While this can stand independently, it completely works as a background piece to my absurd sprawling epic [Someone Like You](http://drsquidlove.livejournal.com/tag/someonelikeyou).
> 
> Oz and all its characters are property of Tom Fontana and HBO. No infringement intended.

Victoria waited on the plush couch, looking up every time the doors swished open. Every time, another sad, exhausted stranger. She wished she'd brought a magazine, but she hadn't anticipated waiting in the lobby. There was a law journal amongst the mail she'd brought from home for Harrison, but she didn't have the attention span for that.

She stood as Harrison hurried through the doors. "You're late."

"By five minutes, Victoria, don't start."

She'd promised herself she wouldn't push but it had felt a lot longer than five minutes. She was itching to get upstairs, and every wasted minute was eating at her. "You'll need a visitor sticker." She waited impatiently as Harrison showed his ID at the desk and collected his sticker, listening to the same directions spiel she'd received when she arrived fifteen minutes early. How on earth could Harrison be late today?

She wanted to ask, but she bit her tongue and they headed together for the elevator. A united front of loving parents.

"What did McManus tell you?"

Victoria's throat closed, but she lifted her chin and forced her voice to work. "He said, 'Mrs Beecher, I have some terrible news.' As though the momentary terror that I was about to hear Toby was dead might lessen the horror of learning he'd been attacked."

His exhale was loud. "Did he say how bad it was?"

"Bad enough they've put him in a hospital." She saw his jaw harden. He thought she was snapping at him, so she softened her voice. "He said some broken bones, nothing life-threatening."

"Oswald is life-threatening. Does he know who did it? Or why?"

"I've stopped believing there's any reason in that wretched place."

The doors opened and they stepped out into a long corridor. Bright sunlight fell through the broad windows and heavy carpet dulled the sounds of their steps but the smells of sickness and disinfectant were unmistakeable. Victoria's dread grew.

"Yes, well, we're going to find out. I'm going to bring a suit against the prison, the warden, the Department of Corrections, every neglectful bureaucrat who ever looked the other way."

"Do you really think that's what Toby wants?"

"Toby's a mess! He's lying upstairs in a goddamned hospital bed! Do you want to pretend that's just fine?"

A couple of nearby staff stared, and a security guard started paying attention. Harrison was a large man, and his voice carried. She put her hand on his elbow. "Nothing's been fine in a long time."

That was all it took to steal the worst of it out of him. He nodded, and they kept walking.

Harrison let his mouth run about litigating as they took the next elevator and the next corridor. Victoria tuned him out. She couldn't blame Harrison one bit for his anger, but it exhausted her. 

She'd reached the end of her strength last week with all the funeral arrangements, but somehow she got herself out of bed every day, put on a smile for Genevieve's mourning family even though she wanted to howl at them: how could Genevieve do this to Toby's children?

And now this. 

Toby wouldn't want them to sue, she was sure. He didn't want them involved in any aspect of his prison life, except their weekly visits, and she lived in fear that if they pushed the wrong way, Toby would refuse to see them at all.

Harrison needed to reign himself in, but she doubted he'd listen to her. It felt like there hadn't been an easy word between her and Harrison since he took that call sixteen months ago from the police station, Toby drunk and in tears and saying incomprehensible things about a little girl on a bike. It was the drugs that turned them bitter. Their Tobias doing heroin, blame batted back and forth like a tennis ball until there was nothing left to say. Until Harrison took a room at the Ritz-Carlton and Victoria found herself breathing easier when she opened the door on an empty house every evening.

This was going to be the first time they'd visited Toby together since the conviction.

* * *

There was a guard slouched in a chair by the door, a pen and newspaper in his lap. "Ten letter word for war?"

"We're here to see Tobias Beecher."

He dumped the paper aside, sighing like they were to blame for his boredom. "ID?"

They showed their licences and he patted them down. What on earth did he think they were bringing to a hospital bed? A hacksaw?

It was the first time she'd seen Harrison endure this. And he her - she noticed the protective spark in his eye as the guard touched her. She barely felt the indignity, these days, but it meant a surprising amount to know he still felt the old chivalry. Neither of them had made much effort to reconcile, but perhaps there was still something. When the guard let them go she rubbed his back, offered a small smile and she was grateful when it was returned.

They walked in and Victoria heard the rush of Harrison's breath. Dear god. A couple of broken bones? Their son looked like a marionette. Heavy white casts were locked around every limb, from hands to shoulders and from his feet all the way to the tops of his thighs, all of it suspended from cables. He was utterly helpless. His head was turned away, and Victoria wanted to deny it was him, but she knew her son. Some monster did this to her child. Her eyes stung.

She looked up and saw her own horror and anger mirrored on Harrison's face. She reached and Harrison's strong hand caught hers, squeezing it tight. He understood. He knew just what she felt.

It took real effort to find her voice. "Toby."

Toby's head turned, and that was worse than the first sight of his body. She didn't know this man at all.

This man... She was afraid of him, broken bones and all.

Victoria moved forward, hoping Toby couldn't see how she was dragging Harrison. "Sweetheart."

Toby's dead-eyed glare never flickered. "Both of you in one visit. Has something happened?"

She had no idea what to say. What the hell could she say? She let go of Harrison, pasted on a smile and forced herself to stroke Toby's hair. It was soaked with sweat, like when he'd had strep in high school. This was Toby, not a stranger. "Are you in pain?"

"What do you think?"

She glanced up at the IV bag, wondering what was in there. "Do you need something for it?"

"They put me on Tramadol. I don't want anything harder."

Because now he had a history of drug abuse. Maybe a good mother would be proud of her son for resisting addiction, but she wanted to tell him not to be ridiculous. He had to be in agony. Just take the damned morphine and worry about the rest of it when he could walk again.

Harrison found his voice. "Who did this, Toby?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters!" Harrison was too loud. Victoria checked to be sure the guard wasn't peeking in. "Somebody in there tried to kill you!"

"If they'd wanted me dead, I'd be dead." The bored voice sent a chill down Victoria's spine. Toby didn't care one way or the other.

"Why, Toby? Why would anyone want to do this to you?"

Something terrible shifted behind Toby's eyes. "That's a very good question, Dad."

Harrison hesitated, but only for a moment. "I'm going to sue the prison system into-"

"No, you're not."

"I won't back down on this," Harrison stormed. "This isn't paying a debt to society! This is torture!" His voice cracked, and Toby ploughed in, loud enough to match him.

"Dad! You can't sue. I won't testify!" Rage was curling his fingers against the plaster. "You can't do anything but make this worse! You have to stay out of it!"

"Goddammit, Toby!"

"Harrison!"

They didn't hear her. Toby's face was turning red as they fought and he was straining in his casts, hate glittering in his eyes. Victoria wanted to tell them to shut up. She wanted to cover her ears and scream it. Toby was lying in a hospital bed with years ahead of him in that godforsaken hellhole and she and Harrison were separated and her grandchildren had no parents to speak of and now they were fighting. She couldn't even hold Toby's hand. Instead she dug her fingers into Harrison's arm to silence him. "Mother sends her love!"

Both men stared at her, flummoxed by the interruption.

"She wanted to come, but her lumbago is playing up."

Now Harrison was entirely confused - Mother played tennis yesterday; her back was fine - but Toby smiled for the first time since they stepped into the room. It was thin, but genuine. "Tell me all about it."

Thank god. Victoria prattled on about lumbago until that awful rage faded from Toby's eyes. Only banked: never completely gone, and it surged back if silence crept in. It scared her, but she wasn't helpless. She could do this for Toby. She talked about the mess the financial manager made in the Beijing office and then prompted Harrison to talk about the fishing trip to Rhode Island two weeks ago. He hadn't been fishing in six months, at least, but he finally understood, pretended the details were fresh. Toby always craved to hear about food on the outside, so Harrison told him all about the sea bass he caught.

"We cooked it with black olives and thyme. It was delicious, wasn't it Victoria?"

"It was lovely. We polished it all off to the bones. "

They referred to themselves as 'we', pretended they lived under the same roof, all the same white lies that had carried Toby this far through his sentence. Nobody mentioned his wife's funeral that he couldn't attend last week, or his mother-in-law picking through the last boxes from the family home that had never been sorted before Genevieve stole the children to the other side of the country. Even the children went unmentioned until the chatter had faded away.

Victoria watched Toby steel himself, and she knew what was coming. "How are the kids?"

"They're doing really well. You'd be so proud of them, Toby. Gary and Holly are inseparable. They're taking good care of each other." It was the only heartening part of this whole mess. Holly would barely let go of Gary's hand, and Gary looked ready to bite anyone who tried to make her. They'd held hands through their mother's funeral, hadn't had eyes for any of their eager relatives until Victoria motioned them through the children's visiting door at Oswald and they saw their father. The way their faces lit to see him...

"Do they understand Genevieve..."

Harrison said, "I think Gary does."

Victoria was sure Holly had a decent grasp on it as well. She screamed like a banshee whenever they tried to put her in the car, had apparently been doing it ever since she saw her mother slumped over the wheel in the garage.

Harrison went on, "They loved their visit with you last week, Toby. Gary's been clamouring to see you again."

"He can't see me like this."

Victoria wanted to argue, but she didn't want them seeing their father like this either. Especially after their last sight of their mother.

But there was a bigger problem. Victoria noticed Harrison's eyes shifting with the same worry. Toby was going to be in these casts for weeks. Jonah and Marta were starting to talk about heading home, about getting the children back in school in San Diego as though it were a foregone conclusion. But what could Victoria do? She was sixty-one years old; she couldn't start chasing three small children around the house. It had been hard enough managing Toby and Angus when she was in her forties, and they were nine years apart. She'd aged more than her fair share since Toby's accident.

Harrison suddenly felt through his pockets. "We brought some new photos." He reached to offer them, blanching when he remembered Toby's arms were immobilised in their ridiculous casts. He regathered quickly, and held the first up in front of Toby's face.

It was the one he'd taken of Holly and Gary a couple of days ago. They were clinging to each other with the sad, hollow-eyed look they'd shared since their mother died, but Toby's eyes welled. "They're really okay?"

"They're upset, and confused." Holly was terrified of cars and Gary was totally indifferent to anyone who wasn't his sister or father. Victoria forced another smile. "They're going to be fine, Toby. Just give them time."

Harrison flipped to the next photo. "Genevieve's sister sent this one of little Harry."

Toby gasped. "He's so big!"

"Marta said he's a little terror, gets his hands in everything."

They said he'd cried for his mommy a few times, but hadn't seemed too disturbed. Three years old: the beaming boy in that photo would carry a fleeting memory of his mother, if he remembered her at all. At least that memory wouldn't be of her dead in her parked car.

"Would you like us to leave the photos here?"

There was only a moment's hesitation, and then Toby nodded eagerly. "Please."

For some reason Toby had never let them leave photos with him in prison last year. He'd always been eager to see pictures, but every time he insisted Victoria take them with her when she left.

Harrison hunted around the hospital room, found a roll of medical tape and taped the two photos to the cable that held Toby's arm. "So you can see them."

"Thanks, Dad." There was a softness in his eyes as he stared at them that hadn't been there since before Kathy Rockwell. "I'll see them when I get out of these casts." He saw Harrison's look, and he looked to Victoria, and his face fell. "Gen's parents are taking them back home."

Neither of them answered. What was there to say?

Toby flushed. "Of course. I hadn't even..."

It's what they would have discussed today, if that weaselly little man McManus hadn't called to tell them Toby was in hospital, his body shattered.

Toby's head sank back on the pillow. "Maybe when I'm out of these casts, they can fly back for a visit."

Harrison's head bobbed. "We'll make sure of it."

A couple of visits a year. Toby couldn't live that way. The light on his face when she brought them in last week was the first - only - happiness she'd seen in him in so long.

The guard rapped on the door. "Time's almost up. You got five minutes."

Victoria glared at him. "Oh, does he have another appointment?" She felt Harrison's hand on her back.

"I don't make the rules, lady."

"For goodness' sake, he's in a hospital bed! What possible reason-"

"You wanna make it two minutes?"

Victoria shut her mouth. They were helpless against the system. Harrison wasn't going to sue anybody. All their money, all their connections, and they were at the mercy of a bored guard.

Toby thinned his lips, a parody of a smile. "It's fine, Mother. It's been nice having you both visit. Hug the kids for me. Tell them I miss them. Tell them I wish..." He trailed off.

That wish list was infinite. "We will, Toby." Her stomach churned. She didn't want to leave him unprotected. This visit was done, and he hadn't given them even a clue of what happened. She had no how or why and now she had to walk away and leave him alone once more. "We'll visit you soon, sweetheart."

She kissed his cheek and Harrison followed suit and when he stepped back he rested his hand on Victoria's back. "You take care, Toby."

Take care. He couldn't even feed himself. They were bidding farewell as though they'd just stopped by his house for coffee. This whole situation was absurd, but she turned for the door and led the way out. She didn't want to give that guard the pleasure of pushing them.

When Toby was convicted, she'd fretted about how he'd ever pick up the pieces when he finally made parole. Now she was beginning to fear he'd never make it out. Even if he survived, she was afraid she wouldn't recognise the man who did.

The elevator ride was silent. Oswald was reaching after them, filthy tendrils that grasped until the doors opened on the bright hospital corridor. 

"Harrison, Toby's never going to get through this with his children living on the other side of the country."

He pressed her out before he answered, towards a window with a view to the summer day outside. The parking lot below looked cheerful after Toby's room upstairs.

"I know. But Vicki, those children just buried their mother. They won't have a father for years. They need family, stability, not a nanny."

"I'll go part time." It was hard to believe that decision was so easy. She'd quit if she had to. Someone else could handle egomaniac financial managers. They'd talk to Genevieve's family about Harry, but she was bringing back Gary and Holly at least. They needed Toby, and Toby needed them. Even so, two children by herself was daunting. It was impossible. "You have to come home." She didn't want to do this without him.

He stared at the carpet, and her heart was in her mouth. Finally he looked up. "I want to. Not just for them. I miss you, Vicki."

He meant it. She hugged him tight, caught her lip when his arms folded around her. His chest swelled under her cheek. If she and Harrison took care of each other, they could take care of Gary and Holly, and if Gary and Holly were all right, they would get Toby through to his parole.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback conspires to debauch and corrupt the morals of society. Concrit thoroughly welcome, warm fuzzies treasured. It is most appreciated on livejournal, <http://drsquidlove.livejournal.com/49950.html> but also by e-mail, drsquidlove @@@ livejournal.com
> 
> There's a little more of this Maggie Beecher in [Someone Like You](http://drsquidlove.livejournal.com/tag/someonelikeyou), but mostly that story is about healed-up Toby stumbling across Detective Elliot Stabler.
> 
>  
> 
> More Squidfic may be found at   
> <http://members.iinet.net.au/~tentacles/squidfic.html>  
> or for stories as they happen,   
> <http://drsquidlove.livejournal.com>


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